The dog days of summer

Let me start by saying “My poor lawn is dying a slow death”.

I have a living will and a power of attorney, and every legal document one can think of just in case the unforeseeable should happen.  I’m not the kind to dwell on sickness – but if I were to get in a head-on car crash, or stroke out, or develop some debilitating disease, My wife, my parents, the US legal system, and now you know that nobody should take drastic measures on me.  Yep, DNR me baby.  Most of my family is the same way – don’t keep us alive just because you can.  It’s about quality of life, not quantity.

But when it comes to the grass in my backyard, this is another story.  I’m doing everything possible to keep the green from turning brown.  Earlier, when we bought our house, some nice men came over in a Chevy pickup, tore up the back and put down fresh Bermuda Grass Sod.  But that was 9 weeks ago and now the Austin summer is taking it’s toll.

According to the newspaper we have had 59 straight days of 100°+ weather.  The levels in the lake are currently the 3rd lowest on record.  Even with the giant Oak and Ash (they are brother and sister trees) providing afternoon shade in the backyard I struggle to keep the disappearing green patches from vanishing altogether.

I keep the lawn mowed short, as is recommended.  I water deeply as everyone tells me to, and I even syringe the turf every night (syringing your grass is lightly spraying it down by hand to cool it  – this is not considered a watering by anyone who knows anything about lawns).

As if the heat weren’t enough, the City of Austin is imposing level 2 water restrictions because we might be  in some kind of draught.  This means that restaurants can’t serve water unless you ask for it.  You can’t hose down your driveway unless it’s to clean some biohazard off the cement, and homeowners can only water once a week.

C’mon now guys, you are tying my hands here!  How am I supposed to pursue drastic life support measures when you only give me one defibrillator paddle?  I spent hours leveling, adding amendments, and selecting the perfect turf for  my zone.   I dreamed of a putting green outside my deck.  Now what I’ve got is a decaying, brown carpet with mange.   I’d do a rain dance, but am afraid that my footsteps will do irreparable damage.